It's About Time

The wedding was starting at 9:00, it was still a 45 minute drive away, and I was suppose to video the bride walking down the aisle so I couldn't be late. I met the others at the carpool meeting place, but some people still hadn't arrived yet so we were waiting. By 8:30, a bit anxious about missing the wedding party entrance, I went ahead and took my passengers and left.

When we arrived at the church at about 9:15 there was one car parked outside the closed gate. We checked the gate...unlocked...slid it open and found a parking spot inside under the shade of a tree. The name on the church was right, so we were in the right place, but the doors were locked and barred and there wasn't a soul in sight.

The rest of the carpool arrived within ten minutes and some people were laughing and muttering about us being on Windhoek time. People passed the time snapping selfies and group photos of everybody dressed up in their wedding best.

At around 10:00 someone came to unlock the church, wedding decorations started arriving, and a few ladies began setting up the chairs and decorations inside the church. By 10:30 the groom and his groomsmen arrived, took a few photos outside, then went inside to help out. The pastor came and started filling out paperwork at the front of the church.

Realizing that we were in no imminent danger of starting, one of our cars made a snack run out to the shops bringing back chips and drinks to share. Another girl in our group knew better, so she had brought a few packs of cards and organized a game in the shade of one of the truck beds.

By 11:30 other guests were arriving and we could hear people practicing the music inside, so we made our way in to find our seats. Slowly the room filled up and they brought out more chairs as people joined in singing along with worship songs and dancing through the aisles.

Around 12:15 the bridal party arrived in their vehicles amid much pomp and circumstance, car horns honking, whistles blowing, ladies doing their typical African "yi-yi-yi-yi-yiiiiii!" Finally, by 12:30 the bride appeared at the back of the church to make her way down the aisle.

So the burning question is...what time did the wedding start? For those from a time-oriented culture (like Windhoek or Western countries) the event started at 12:30, when the bride finally arrived. Those people would have been incredibly anxious and frustrated that the wedding started 3.5 hours "late." Perhaps they were busy thinking about all the productive things they could've been doing with that time or how this will now run into their other scheduled activities.

Meanwhile, for those from an event-oriented culture (like the African village) this is completely normal. They have set aside the whole day for this event. When 9:00 rolls around, it's time to start getting ready. Preparation is part of the event. For those who arrive to the venue early, it's important social time to invest in relationships and the life of the community. Then, once everyone has arrived and everything is ready, the bride can come...but the event has already been going on all morning.

Different understandings of time have caused frustration for many a cross-cultural sojourner. But it's important to recognize that one view is not right and the other wrong, they are just different. Each culture expresses different values. The one is not disrespecting your time. And the other is not rudely rushed or hurried. They're just different.

This is one of many cultural differences that we will be discussing in my Intercultural Studies course at NETS. And one that my experiences in Namibia have provided many real life illustrations for!